May 2013
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I read a Facebook update as “about to be blown by David Copperfield” and laughed and then saw who posted it and got confused because they weren’t that funny. Then I saw it was “about to be mind blown by David Copperfield.”
My Pizza
badkidsjokes:
man:waiter how long will my pizza be ? waiter:not very long. lol
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“It is a soft ‘G,’ pronounced ‘jif.’ End of... →
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Branham was so convincing a preacher that, when he died in a 1965 automobile...
– James Randi, The Faith Healers
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The big men who came to get the power back on are driving away and leaving me here with Nickelback. Time to piss myself.
Okay so this station plays Seventies, Eighties and Nickelback. I had to Shazaam the song because the lyrics were making me laugh.
Aw fuck yeah, Soft Cell
I’m glad I never started liking The Clash so I never had to stop liking them for Rock the Casbah.
It’s Saturday night and I want to blare ”I’ve Got Friends in Low Places” from my parked car to motivate the maintenance guys to fix this shit so I can get back to playing Minecraft for long periods of time until I start to hate myself.
If I were Catholic I would promise my patron saint an ex-voto of recording a cover of ”Do You Believe in Love?” By Huey Lewis and the News if they fixed the power soon. I might technically be Catholic because I’m pretty sure my grandmother performed a quick laity baptism on me in the tub when I was a kid.
Haha it would be hilarious if I had a serious drug problem is what I mean.
If I had to live in the Seventies I would just nonstop do drugs, I don’t think there was really anything else to do in that decade.
I’m sitting here listening to The Scorpions while someone is fucking with the power lines outside, this is the most banal variety of surreal.
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Were there a mountain all made of gold,
doubled that would not be enough
to...
– Samyutta Nikāya 1.156 (via modernmonkeymiscellany)
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